Adoubt

IMG_20140411_123153I turned 21 few days back. Reaching this stage of life didnt felt like a joyful event. Not sure why, but thats how i feel. Dont question me. Results were released and there i go, no where. Im officially stagnant. The only thing i know next is, enlisting into Army.

All the best, lil boy.

 

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Peace come from within. Do not seek it without.

Rilkean heart, I looked for you to give me
Transcendent experiences
To transport me out of self and aloneness
Sent alienation

Into a sense of oneness and connection, ecstatic and magical
I became a junkie for it
I come looking for the next high
And I’m sorry, I’ve been putting the search on the wrong place

I understand that you’re confused
Feeling overwhelmed
Well, that’s a feeling state from then
The reality

But becoming truly self-reliant
And become connected with something beyond me
That is where I have to go
I’m so sorry I’ve been putting the search on the wrong place

You’re lost and don’t know what to do
But that’s not all of you
[Incomprehensible] reality today
And then is all okay

The lyrics described very appropriately how i’m feeling lately… I have always being reminding myself to get back on track(middle path). i feel that i have been maximizing myself beyond my own ability.

Dharma practice is everyday life and I am so thankful to meet great teachers like Ajahn Brahm, Bro Piya Tan and various beautiful practitioners in my life. Simple wisdom (of course, very deep ones) are great antidotes to difficult situations.

There are many “HR issues” even when you’re a Dharma worker/volunteer… Our pure intentions are very often polluted by many unintentional problems caused by difficult situations and environment. But that’s where our daily practice come in handy. I may not know many deep teachings from the scriptures, but i know meditation brings us clarity that lead us to understand problems better.

to be continued…